The Journal For 2009

well,it almost year since i climb up from where i fall down....Well,when i stare back to each thing i done this years ,i found that they are very meaningful to me.They will become part of my memory, and i learn a lot...Each thing i done contribute on building my confidence, my maturity,my experience ...even though my life for now dont seem to have any extraordinary thing but i always believe that it will be extraordinary when i can catch my dream,just like a comet only shine beautifully when the ice from it body melt by the sun...but anyway there still a long way to go.. there still so many unknowns , i will keep on fighting out my way! I m fighting dreamer...and with my motto ''dream is always not far away''..
Dont let anyone take away your dream,
Dont let the history bothering your future ,
Dont let yourself appreciate when u lost something....

Note

莎士比亚说: 再好的东西都有失去的一天。再深的记忆也有淡忘的一天。再爱的人，也有远走的一天。再美的梦也有苏醒的一天。该放弃的决不挽留。该珍惜的绝不放手。

No one can see through

Well, this the post while i m on the mission11.11...anyway, i finally found the momentum to move on..a fire which cause my desire to burn....well...anyway,the fire is light up by someone, i dont know whether it is true that many ppl assume that someone that fall down will never be able to wake up anymore...but i have to prove to them...they are wrong...well,i ever fell down...a few times, and have some experiences on that...i must prove that i can run faster and will not fall down again....See how i fulfill my destiny...and thank for the one who always support me...we must prove that we are not the one fall down and never stand up again..we are the one..who learn something which the people never fall down will never know..

tired of life

There are one or 2 more week till the mission day, can i accomplish the mission objective this time? well....my minds suddenly appear a lot of question marks recently i start to doubt about am i able to fulfills my parent hopes, as a eldest child in a small family is not easy but i still have to accept the destiny,i do not dare to think what is my parent reaction if i have fail their expectation...am i able to satisfy my own requirement i set up for myself, am i?? am i able to withstand the pressure and the coming challenge , am i the one to her? am i?? i don't know ......i m tired of all of these .....
i am tired of everything.i just want a rest, not a holiday....is a rest that can make those thing out of my mind temporally .....is this really life?? is this really my life?? if yes...then my ideal life would just like the ideal gas in physic, too much of assumption....i am tired of fighting alone ,am i??i don't know how long i can stand on my own,but i know i cant fall down...if i fall down,too much of people would be hurt.I really do need a short rest....a short period of time i can let a all those burden down from my shoulder....a rest after a long walk is necessary...

Mission 11.11

新的‘任务’已经接到了，呵呵..........因为exam是在十一月十一号所以我把它叫做任务11.11 .......还真块快，不管怎样这次的任务中我真的不希望再像上次一样.......我知道不容易，我会尽力......还是一样的问题吧，由于对化学没什么兴趣，就是提不起劲去了解........数学和物理都是我的fav所以都还好.........PA嘛.....Aiyaya.......普普通通........现在的生活视乎越来越累，我也不知道我靠什么撑到现在的，是以前的我.......早就到下了,家里也出现了一些问题.......不知道是不是人真的会在艰难中成长.......发觉自己，比以前更坚强了..........不管怎样也是一年半罢了，我一定要撑下去！！而且我开始了解“the one who live through the hardness and happiness ，is the one who understand the meaning of life''这句话了.......其实，身边还是有很多快乐的事,所一都不至于那么残。还有很多朋友的鼓励和支持......^_^谢谢lunas GENG整天陪我去吃东西....haha，吃东西是我解压的方法....还好我吃不肥....(目前为止).....好吧，该停下来继续我的journey了.....

A new event of my life....

I have fail for 5 times,and i can say i have experienced through all of them...they are not a very good memories of mine...but recently the feel come back, and i start to panic....at the situation i dont know what i should do.....because i m afraid of this feel it make ppl happy,sad or even go mad....but i know that this is true, the feeling is true....i dont know how long i can hold this feeling .....and i just hope...it will be something better ....just hope this feeling wont bring me down again..

The road that never end(friendship)

well,my class...(form 5)just held a reunion last Saturday ,and we face some obstacles while planing this reunion party ,some of the class member are not interested at all and they said something that very heart breaking.Anyway after we put a lot of effort....finally the party was successfully organized ....and there is 36 class member present, and some are absent with some stupid reason...just forget about it,on that night ,we have bbq and steam boat there, and i sing a song ‘love story’ with my friend guitar...haha..quite nervous.That night,i can feel what is mean by 友情，while watching the photo in class, Pangkor trip,chemistry lab....i miss all my friend, some of them might leaving this country soon...and may be we might not see each other again.So，i m appreciate with the reunion night....and i hope next year reunion party ,all the member will present

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poison

well,as a human we always have our own opinion ,our way of thinking ,our principles...there is no right or wrong ....but when u r forcing someone to accept your opinion or when u critic about other opinion,that is WRONG or an insulting act and do always make one inconvenient ...for example,when u are so concentrate on doing a math question and there is someone say:''OH man...what happened !?it today the end of the world??y r u so enthusiasm ...be relax lar man...like me'' this sentences do really pissed me off!!! what wrong with you? am i doing anything wrong!! there is non of your business ....well..this is a perfect example....sometimes, we should think before we speak,just like i think before i react...if not ,my knuckle will land on that guy's face as well...anyway,that not the main point...what i want to say is, learn to respect the other before other respect you...gaining a respectation not always need to show how profesional you are...sometimes stay calm will help you much more...so,respect other people thinking,respect their way of solving problem..then u will have others respect...

Reflection of the effort

I just finished my exam b4 holiday,and after the holiday...i get my results,well...i think i m not satisfied at all with my result....or i should say i not satisfied with myself.the result is a reflection of how much effort put in,but when i staring at my result...i see,there is little disapoinment , little sadness ,and i come to realize that i have to double my effort...i have to be more enthusiasm , now i promise myself....next time,when i post smthing about my end year exam result,there will be a 'satisfied ' word in my post...this i promise myself..

Exploring the unknow

After a long run,finally i come to rest...it been a few month...but i felt like just a few days.Everyday, there are a lot of stimulation which accumulate daily become my new experiences...well,on the path which i taken...i meet some friends , that possessed different kind of thinking...when i ask them,what do u think with word 'dream'...some of them tell me, dream is nothing important ...seems like they dont care about it..but actually they are much care than i do... like they are hiding smth,and some tell me ,dream like something not real,they do have negative opinions with dream, some tell me i dont have any dream.But for me dream is the reason why i m here...i m here to pursue my dream...some of them might say u r such a naive kid...well, everyone do have their own opinion,we cant say their opinion is true or wrong, we should not blindly follow others...we should have our own principle which we think it is right and we used to...how about you? what do you think about Dream?haha...
i always have a motto
-Dream is always not far away-

After a short Break

学校假期，转眼就这样过了。。。休息了几天，剩下的几天就用来拼回之前落后的lesson。。。昨天跟一些朋友去‘傻’，开始我们去了jusco看了‘Gi Joe’然后去KFC吃，然后，就不知道谁提议要去pacific。。。所以全部就‘pia’去pacific，走了没一下。。。又有人提议去sunway。。。然后我们又在‘pia’去sunway。。在这里走了一段时间然后去600c。c吃。。。都是佩佩啦。。‘指引’我们进去。哇，我叫了牛肉面。。。rm10.00和一杯不知道什么牛奶。。。rm4.70。。。六个人吃了 六十多块。哇！！心痛。。早知去吃pizza。。。算了。。过后就送朋友回家了咯。。然后就会到家。。很累。。。不过，很傻的一天。。。算是我这个假期的结局了。。。隔天就开始要温习了。。。开学就拿成绩。。自己心理已有数了。。ok吧。。好了。。这里stop了。。。

Covering Up my memories

well, i been stayed in SMKSB for almost one month and i am comfortable with my life style right now...even though i m busier ....anyway,everything is going smoothly so there is nothing much to worry about...what i worry about is the part of my mind...
As i growing older i start to think more... these a few day, i think of all my form 5 friend, my gang or i should say my brother....i miss them...well,it seem that they r the only reason why i never regret for stayed in Chio Min for two year....i like the way they treat me, the way they call me...haha..i will never forget what we use to do in class....eating during teacher r teaching, talking about computer games...Finally we r forced to separate as we have finish our form 5 school life, some of them pursue their dream in other college while i remain stay in form 6...Day by day..i found that ,we become more and more strange ..they start to ignore my msg ,i m badly hurt...someone tell me,these r the reality ....sometimes we cant keep all of our friend...i hope she was wrong....and i hope everyone will comeback during our class reunion party...i just want to taste the feel when be with them....i just hope i will never be forgotten ....i just hope when we meet someday...they will call me brother once again....

I'm on my way....

Finally,i m able to step into SMK SULTAN BADLISHAH , and i have some new and nice friends here...hehe.The enviroment here is different with my previous school,the student r given much more spaces and the teachers r not so strict will the rule.. anyway,i like the way they are..haha,so the problem now is...i m facing money crisis, my expends per month is about 300...I think i can understand most of the lesson but definitely not include chemistry,even though ..the calculation just some simple math calculation...actually wat in my mind is ,i plan to drop chemistry and take further pure mathematics...it seem that there is no teacher that teaching this subject so...i have to throw away this proposal ...anyway..i hope i will doing great...see ya

人生的结局

我的婆婆在5月22号，受不住病魔的折磨。。。离开了人间。对与我来说，有无尽的遗憾。。。虽然我都尽了自己的责任。。。在她离开前一天，我去医院探望她，他还很好的。。。当我们离开是他就哭着要我们留下。。。我们只有哄哄他就离开。。现在想起我心理很内疚。。。我应该多陪陪他一会儿。。想起他在家里时我也没什么陪她。。。他已经够可怜的。。有几个孩子都不来看她的。我小时父母去外国做工，那时我是他照顾的。。。所以对他我有一定的感情。。。恨自己为什么没有了才去后悔。。也许这就是人的本性－－失去以后才会学会珍惜。。。希望她可以安息。。。虽然她也是走的很遗憾。。孩子不和，常常吵架。。。对于我来说，当我有一天走时。。我希望自己不会留下遗憾

中六——体验中（1）

这是第一次，我有这样的感觉。。。踏入我最熟悉的学校可是却有着很陌生的心情。如何说呢。。。我也不知道。我在转入新学校之前要在觉民度过。。。呵呵。。。我其待已久的中六终于来了。老师为我们讲解中六的课程，说明种种明对中六需要的态度。。。其实我早已准备好了。在进入physic课时，我发现到。。。这已经不是以前的physic。。。中六的physic很高级。。。不管怎样，这是我选的路。。我希望用这条路来追求我的梦想。。。我不在乎别人对我说这条路有多难走，多辛苦，我只知道。。。我不想留下遗憾。。。我会尽力，就算真的最后不成功至少我尽力过，我试过！！！我没对不起自己。。。希望一切都会顺利，各位朋友们。。。怀念在太阳下奔跑的我们。。。我们一起加油吧，一起追梦吧！！希望在远方的你们开心！

最后的准备，中六，我来了！！

我从槟城做工回来了，哈哈。。做工的生活蛮闷的，现在就是要转校等开学，我已经等不及了。。想到转校的东西就烦。。恨不得马上就去搞定它！希望会顺利吧。。。去到那边将会开始我另一段的旅程所以我需要让自己对以前再也没牵挂，其实心理有件事。。。我一直都放不下。就是我的前女友的事。。。我还是很内疚，所以我决定鼓起勇气去跟她道歉。。。呵呵，还好一切都已经没什么了。。。我闷还是朋友。我太开心。。。我现在在也没什么牵挂，可以专心冲向我的梦想。。。看来我的好朋友闷都在努力了，啊哈哈。。。我当然也不会偷懒，你们放心我会追上你们的。。。槟城的朋友，他们也有自己的打算了。。。大家似乎都很有semangat！我觉得大家都长大了，有自己的理想。。。有自己的思想。。。各分东西。。。。其实我很希望能跟全部朋友聚在一起。。。或许没什么机会了。。。不过我还是期待。。。我很怀念跟你们在一起的日子。。。请不要忘记我－－－－－江书腩－－－－－－

First step for my Life

路已经选好了，现在要开始准备了。。所以第一个准备就是去做工。。准备好钱开学。。哈哈哈哈！明天就会去penang做工，^_^最近一切都很不错，真的感觉一切跟以前不同了。。。回到了我的跆拳道班，哈。。。我的学生们个个都有进步了咯。。只是我还没进步，要加紧练习了！

21 things that girl dont relize

21 things Girls dont realize

> You HAVE to read all of them and if you don't your going to come across with problems in your relationship for the next month!

> 1) Guys may be flirting around all day, but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about....

> 2) Guys are more emotional than you think, if they loved you at one point, it'll take them a lot longer then you think to let you go, and it hurts every second that they try.

> 3) Guys go crazy over a girl's smile(:

> 4) A guy who likes you wants to be the only guy you talk to.

> 5) Giving a guy a hanging message like "You know what?..uh...nevermind.." would make him jump to a conclusion that is far from what you are thinking. And he'll assume he did something wrong and he'll obsess about it trying to figure it out.

> 6) If a guy tells you about his problems, he just needs someone to listen to him. You don't need to give advice.

> 7) A usual act that proves that the guy

> likes you is when he teases you.

> 8) GUYS LOVE YOU MORE THEN YOU LOVE THEM!!!

> 9) Guys use words like hot or cute to describe girls. They rarely use beautiful or gorgeous. If a guy uses that, he loves you or likes you a whole heck of a lot.

> 10)If the guy does something stupid in front of the girl, he will think about it for the next couple days or until the next time he spends time with the girl.

> 11)If a guy looks unusually calm and laid back, he's probably faking it and he is really thinking about something

> 12) When a guy says he is going crazy about the girl, he really is

> Guys rarely say that

> 13)When a guy asks you to leave him alone, he's just actually saying, "Please come and listen to me

> 14)If a guy starts to talk seriously, listen to him. It doesn't happen that often, so when it does, you know something's up.

> 15) When a guy looks at you for longer than a second, he's definitely thinking

> something.

> 16) Guys really think that girls are strange and have unpredictable decisions and are MAD confusing but somehow are drawn even more to them

> 17)A guy would give the world to be able to read a girl's mind for a day.

> 18)No guy can handle all his problems on his own.

> He's just too stubborn to admit it

> 19)NOT ALL GUYS ARE RUDE!!!

> Just because ONE is RUDE doesnt mean he represents ALL of them

> 20)WHEN A GUY SACRIFICES HIS SLEEP AND HEALTH JUST TO TALK TO YOU, HE REALLY LIKES YOU AND WANTS TO BE WITH YOU AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE

> 21)Even if you dump a guy months ago and he loved you he probably still does and if he had one wish it would be you to come back into his life

Turning point

我终于回来了，回到我正常的生活。。。也就是说PLKN完了。呵呵，好舍不得我的朋友啊，尤其是某个人。。哈哈哈哈！真的就像做了一场梦，一切都是如此的美好。在里面学到了不少东西。回来后拿了成绩。。en还好。。不会很差。所以我人生又进入了新的阶段，希望接下去的路都不会难走。。。